SEPTEMBER 6–In the Meantime..

I’d like to recognize/document summer, and appreciate the continued kindness and interest in what is going on with us. VISITORS They started with Caitlin’s “main” ICU nurse, Erin, who visited us with her husband and three charming little daughters (3 under age 5!) in June.  They called me “Miss Maryanne,” and Nick, “Uncle Mike.” In […]

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SEPTEMBER 6 — What will happen?

I keep thinking we can turn back time. An illogical thought, of course, and one which only lasts for a second, but which comes to me every single day. Inside my kitchen medicine cabinet, I have always tacked up recipes, poems, cholesterol counts, phone numbers of relatives in Ireland. I noticed this calendar last week. […]

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JULY 31–From Martha’s Vineyard

If someone had told us, last summer, that Caitlin would get her transplant and that we would be celebrating her next birthday on the Vineyard, we would have been overjoyed. Caitlin loved it here. We came here for two magical weeks after her months in the hospital when she was 11. There were teenage years […]

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JULY 10 — The Miracle of Video

In the past hour, I’ve heard from a few people who said how nice it was to read Caitlin’s words, to “hear” her. I’m going to share a few snippets of iPhone video here.  I often think that not long ago, people didn’t even have photographs of loved ones. All they had were drawings (if […]

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JULY 10 — Announcements

The Memorial Service In December, we barely knew what we were doing as we quickly put together the most beautiful funeral service we could. We wanted to include everyone who wanted to come. But the chapel at the cemetery was tiny. We could only accommodate 100 or so people. Plus it was the holidays. A […]

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JUNE 20–Solstice to Solstice

I am not the first person to compare time to a river, but from my desk here, the comparison is ever-present, the imagery apt. Drop something into the river and off it goes. It’s never coming back. It’s six months today. And a Tuesday, just as it was then. Another solstice. And the great world […]

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JUNE 2 — An Overdue Update with Pics

We are 5+ months out now, a time when a lot of grieving people notice that they have been—-unintentionally of course—-left alone with their grief. We are grateful this hasn’t happened, that so many wonderful people continue to reach out to us. Thank you, thank you. It means so much…. because I will be honest—-it […]

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APRIL 24–Three years ago today.

Caitlin was actively listed for a lung transplant on April 24, 2014. We were ready, expectant, full of hope. She kept herself strong and she kept herself busy. She was grateful. She had plans. We never, ever expected that she would have to wait 2 1/2 years. But when she went into the hospital for […]

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APRIL 20–Speak to Me in Joni

Somebody somewhere recently posted a meme I agree with:  Belief + Doubt = Sanity. That said, I’m just going to relay what happened. Previously, I’ve talked about the fact that three of us saw a couple of well-regarded mediums and that Caitlin ‘came through’ with details that no one could possibly know. Here is a […]

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APRIL 13–Venturing Out

On Tuesday, I spent the entire day at Caitlin’s Boston apartment. I emptied the Pittsburgh boxes, decided what to do with the contents, broke down all the cardboard. I made the bedrooms look inviting again. I did laundry there for the first time since last summer, when we briefly escaped Pittsburgh for home and Caitlin […]

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